The Rhino Path is not strewn with rosebuds and lollipops, whatever you may have heard. But Nature has given Us one swell ability, namely, our In-ability to count beyond ‘Three’. One and Two, We’re fine. After Three, blah-blah-blah, which adds up to ‘more’.

Because there is this situation, We can have a Birthday Celebration whenever it strikes our fancy. Gifts are not necessary, but a Cake dresses up the event. The Birthday Rhino can share the cake, but it is not mandatory; some cakes are too small for that. Also, while We are at it, We can declare birthdays, sometimes more than one a day.

See what you can do to spread our system among your friends. They may need time to adjust, but shortly they will get on the bandwagon with you. After all, Cake is Cake.

Now and then a Rhino will flip its switch, and proceed as if addressing a world filled with Idiots.

We ‘Idiots’ often ask ourselves if the effort spent on correcting Us might be better spent addressing Rhino #1’s sense of superiority.

Or perhaps Rhino #1 is perfect as is. (Please snigger softly.)

Jolly Greetings on this, the second day of the Spring Solstice.
Makes a Rhino feel bouyant, which is no mean trick.

Also: today is National Fragrance Day!

We’re sorry to have been out of commission for a few days. Sorry.

Today We are focused on Hissy Fits and Acting Up. For Rhinos, these are mostly prompted by a sense of being wronged, with or without justification. We get ourselves worked up, and then, do everything We can to annoy everyone else.

Why should anybody get to giggle and smirk when We are outlandishly Grumpy?

Rhinos are fortunate that We have very little to do in the average day, except eating, maintaining our heft.

Thus We have time to consider who We would like to be and how We would conduct ourselves, when these dreams come true. And We can retrim our desires at short notice, which is good, since We shift our individual focus, sometimes hourly.

These activities don’t slow our chewing which is the major necessity. And We can always rely on our innate Rhino-ness to salvage the situation, in case We have forgotten who We are for the moment.

Rhinos have always enjoyed the hullabaloo of St. Patrick’s Day. So We thought We should give you our recipe for Shamrock Pie. Well, it turns out that Shamrocks are poisonous for humans, (who’d a thunk it?), so We had to settle on showing you how charming such a pie can be.

Disappointment is a risk We run, letting you Readers in on Rhino folkways, but better that than put our Readership in the hospital.

May the winds of fortune sail you,

May you sail a gentle sea,

May it always be the other guy

Who says, “This drink’s on me.”

Bill & Elias & Thor

Once in a while, We Rhinos have to unload some of the Energy We generate. Gotta let go and cavort.

That’s how it is, and that’s how it”s been!

Some letters have come our way, focused on the bias We have for Rhinoceroses. “Bias”: seems to mean unfair and stinky. Apparently there are few specific targets nominated for specific criticism. How We Rhinos could hope to respond is lost in a fog of bruised feelings.

It seems these Readers have missed the point of our Blog-ular Efforts. As Rhinos, We admit that other species’ concerns are theirs to evaluate. We wish them all the best; We Rhinos are keenly aware of our difficulties as We press forward with our Blog. We want to discuss any matter any Reader would seriously offer for consideration, whatever the species.

Our blog is Rhino-Centric, We know. It would be mighty odd if it was something else. Our blog posts aim at improving inter-species relations- making the whole project Special. Though Rhino Opinion seems unequivocally insightful to Us, We would not be surprised if another critter had some other idea. It happens. Our World is mysterious.

Wm. Buckland, DD, a dean at Oxford, in the UK, was a theologian, but also a self-determined geologist. For his singular accomplishment he will always be linked to the study of dinosaurs and other ancient lifeforms because (Ta-Daaa!) he was the first person to give his specimens Names. This may not seem major to you, dear Readers, but his process and studies made for a good deal of fuss back in the 1820s, 30s and 40s. He got lots of medals.

Shown here is a Megalosaurus, meaning Giant Lizard. But Mr. Buckland was working his theories out based on a handful of random bones. (No complete Megalosaur has ever been found, though they formed a large and varied family.) Nobody had done it before, and it makes an interesting study.

The major error of Mr. Buckland’s model is that Megalosaurus walked on his hind legs. Easy for us to say now, but back then the models to work from were the animals, like crocodiles, still around. The history of how folks come to grip with this world is fascinating, say We Rhinos.

Many plants produce a fragrance that attracts useful bugs and critters. Useful means that they offer some benefit to the plant. So all over the place, greenery is pumping out Sniff-Stimulants.

Rhinos are not official connoisseurs, but We know a lot about scent, both production and interpretation. What is a fact is that Scent travels in tiny globules, wafted by the breeze.

However, Scent is not uniform or static. ‘Sweet & alluring’ today can turn into ‘disgusting & revolting’ any time it wants to. We have a long history of being fooled, but Rhinos are working on the problem. In truth, our success thus far has been modest. Good luck to Us.