RTots are a notoriously impatient crowd. Rhino Moms must often field questions about when a forbidden activity will be allowed, like jumping off a cliff or picnicking with lions.
The standard reply, a classic in its own right, is: “When you can lay an egg.”
So far, this snappy response has gone unchallenged. For 50 million years.
Some critters don’t belong in a Kitchen, like, say, Rhinos for instance. We are not meant by Nature to cook, within the conventional definition.
Yes, We like to eat, Bigtime. Lots and lots. But We would snarf up all the ingredients long before any other kitchen-y process got underway.
Why wait around?
When Rhinos hit adolescence, We usually strike off on our own to deal with the Wild. That’s the System We work with.
Many of Us are solitary. Because that is the case, We must attend to our business, each for themselves.
When We think ‘Do-It-Yourself’ projects, We mean it. Whatever We do.
Moveable type was first used in Europe by Herr Johannes Gutenberg. This method of printing was a Major Achievement in the history of Western Thought, whatever that may be.
Rhinos are partial to Herr Gutenberg’s beard, which was very stylish indeed. We do not have beards, but enjoy imagining them just the same. Why not?
Rhinos are illiterate, which would be a great problem if We did not know all We need to Naturally.
If We Rhinos were quite sure what a Summer Solstice was, We’d probably have been ready yesterday.
Fortunately, We are just as full of hot air today as yesterday.
Rhinos are a consistent species.
In the Wild, We Rhinos have to watch our step. The occasional bump or bruise just goes with the territory, perfectly Natural. But there is a serious Limit.
In the Wild, there is no medical attention, no sick leave. In the Wild, We have to keep moving; if you sit in one place too long, some critter is likely to come take a bite.
We must do what We can, as long as We can, Naturally.
‘Where’ is always relative, right?
As far as any Rhino has ever figured it out, Where We are at a given moment is probably not going to mean much in two minutes; We will have moved on, probably mentally or physically or both. Definitely some Where else.
Anchors, Aweigh!
