Today is ‘Talk Like a Pirate Day’, which is naturally good news. Not only does it affect our pronunciation, but it adds color to our vocabularies. Rhinos are all for it.

The Rhino attitude to Piracy is that, while We enjoy colorful behavior and derring-do, We were never meant for a life at sea. Our diet always has the trump card for Us, and vegetables at sea are usually missing. We would waste away.

Still, We heave anchor with ye, it being the top of the tide. Sadly, We can’t all be trapeze artists.